Lets evaluate? U kissed one boss and lef twith another man. I cock teased the other, hardcore had a tongue jammed down my throat, made out w aa third then left in a cab w alex w them all yelling at me and offering rides. My cheek was also licked and bitten by 2 other men and we almost made out (u and me) because they asked. were hired.
the jolly green giant just puched the pope. halloween is the best.
This is how we made chicken soup last night: Whole chicken in a pot of vodka with a box of crackers and some carrots. We should go pro.
My professor just used the phrase "balls deep in your mind". My day is officially made.
She wants to have naked weekends
They call that free range vagina in France
I mean, I can get to know him eventually. The time frame doesn't really matter. I'll have sex with him regardless of whether he's interesting or not.
You may genuinely find a use for the siphon. But the bag of human hair is less likely.
He doesn't belong with God. He belongs face-down in a pile of his own excrement, vomit, blood and semen. Then pissed on by Satan.
They installed a lotion dispenser in the bathroom at work... its like they want me to masturbate on the clock...
This is what we do on Thursday nights. Spray tans, blunts and drawing pictures of cats.
I have made the descision to sacrifice the first of my family's dogs that wakes me before noon tomorrow. I may quickly become the family outcast
WINE AND FILM. TALK ABOUT AN UPGRADE FROM NETFLIX AND CHILL.
We aren't doing Shrooms tonight bc that would be friendship cheating on you
We need to get walkie talkies for when we're drunk so if we are at different parties or lost we can talk
If he ever pulls my hair again, I'm going to conveniently have lock jaw. Then he can decide whether pain during sex is still fucking appealing.
Randomize
