why is pumping your own stomach in your searches on youtube?
Sophomore year, I fucked on your desk chair. I'm sorry. I love you.
Just invented taco cereal.
I was preparing to do my walk of shame shirtless, but then I found my sweater, wallet and keys neatly piled under a tree in the park.
Ya I know. She's self aware though, like the terminator. Which is the best kind of crazy
I can't believe she made out with my 15 year old brother. That kid can seriously pull.
I woke up to realize my keys were on the front porch. Also so was I. So close yet so far
So because I'm off tomorrow that means your dick could be in my mouth majority of that time
Oh, also as a concerning side note, my bra had drops of blood on it. So I don't know what the deal was, but someone I was around was definitely bleeding a decent amount.
He said I gave him the best head he's ever had and I bowed. I BOWED.
you're the third guy in less than 24 hours she fucked. I'm glad you lost your virginity just don't act like you climbed Mt. Everest.
I tried to light my cup as a bong. I'm done drinking
we're at the bar celebrating my ex bootycall getting his new gf pregnant... and me narrowly escaping a future as kitty foreman
Day drunk. He was sitting in the back seat, opened the door, leaned out, and peed right there in the dutch bros drive through. No one even noticed haha
Babe if there was a way to give a back rub and head at the same time that's what I would ask for my birthday, Christmas and of course right now. Please think about how and get back to me.
Randomize
