guess who just spent driver's ed figuring out how to draw a guy giving head
Best part is I totaly had to get into my dads car like I didn't have my pants off two minutes ago.
so i was creeping on him today and there was like nothing new except he became a fan of getting dome
i wish i could be like. "i like giving dome, lets be friends"
We woke up next to each other with a mutual look of disgust, and then he left. I knew I should have gone for the younger brother.
Dude. Muppets take manhattan on netflix instant. Pass my midterm or relive my childhood? Tough decision.
I discovered the grieving process is shock, denial, anger...and then something about drinking until you puke on yourself
I left when they started reinacting what appeared to be a jerry springer episode
Well yea but it's the principle of the thing.. The fact that he could actually BE your daddy
Annabeth just got on the bar and slurred something about how she was worried that when she started dating you your penis wouldnt fit. You are one lucky bastard my friend.
Some idiot from high school is in the hospital for bonging three beers up his ass
He should have died. Natural selection.
Ok not good, my info has definitely been submitted to this sugar daddy website before.
SITTING NEXT TO A CIRCUS PERFORMER AT PLANNED PARENTHOOD. THIS IS MY LIFE.
Wait. You NEVER used a Dizzy Doodler pen as a vibrator?!?
Hey, I'm just seeing how you're doing and letting you know I fucked your dad last night. Don't fuck with me.
i'm not sure what you are doing right now, but i know that i don't like it. whatever you are doing. just stop. come here so we can fuck
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