Mr. Last Night just informed me I told him to be very quiet when he left this morning and high-fived him as a goodnight kiss. Drunk me is slutty and manly.
the next morning i told him i was impressed that he remembered my name. he said it wasn't that hard when "tracy
Facebook is used to stalk your friends, Twitter is used to stalk celebritie=s, and Myspace is used to stalk underaged girls. Everything else is porn. T=he Internet in a nutshell.
i spelled "betch" that way on purpose, don't question my abilities as a drunk texter
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Question. Will thrown up fruit loops go down the shower drain?
Im debating on how to word my craigslist post so i dont get arrested...
Absolutely. Last time I signed up for a softball league I had sex with my high school economics teacher.
Yes I want to fuck your friends but it's out of respect and love for you.
i dont trust my judgment anymore so im only going to fuck guys who can donate blood at the red cross. they have standards.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She said she'll drive over, bang, and then head home. It's like ordering a pizza.
Not after That Night. No. I hate tequila. And it hates me. Very mutual hateship going on.
Had to immediately delete the Bevmo email because I can't even look at an email about alcohol right now.
He was wearing an Affliction shirt, a Monster hat, and he asked me for anal within 5 minutes of meeting me. Like 3 strikes and you're out, bro.
Do you ever look at someone's Snapchat story and think ‘you told me you would eat my ass’?
Just googled myself and a bunch of boob shots of me came up. Apparently my phone automatically uploaded them to my google plus.
Please google me ASAP and ensure I corrected this...
Randomize