She went from zero to smokin in five shots
oh btw spread eagle is not an appropriate phrase to use in a scientific presentation. learned that the hard way
You had sex with him even after he literally described himself as a "coldplay guy"? There's a line you just don't cross. There is a line.
i almost burnt down an apartment complex. little busy, get back to you later
how should i feel about a person who brings a box of eggo waffles on the plane as a carry on?
Pissing in la rieve gfox. Jer zsyuis diu drunk but it felt amazunbg
Dans le librearie ivetre. Hjhaha
Your expertise in crazy bitches is needed.
she's crying and begging for her chapstick and insisting on walking home...her every thursday ritual
Hey can you send me a copy of my mugshot? I need it to prove a point
while he was teaching, every time he said "wet" he would look at me, that's what you get for sleeping with the professor's assistant
I just woke up naked next to a GetGo sandwich and I can hear my cats are eating my combos. So that's my life.
She just kept roaring and saying Katy Perry had nothing on her. Wtf did she take?
Update: I spent 10 minutes trying to fish out a rogue vagina weight.
You were staring right at you dick at the urinals, then looked at all the other guys dicks and fist pumped saying "I win!"
we went book shopping, so yes this relationship is going to be about more than sex
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