he poured tabasco sauce in my vag.. I'm still having a hard time going to the bathroom.
Went home with a guy 2 " his house". Woke up this morn on couch to parents cooking breakfast, piss all over my back and he is no where to be found. That fuckr pissed on me and bounced. His parents are gonna think some drunk bitch pissed their couch.
Also I just saw on facebook your sister is taking pole dancing lessons. Just a heads up.
i saw his dick when we were four, so thats kind of ruined for me now
The liquor store wont accept checks from us anymore.
i thought i'd fucked her to death. no lie. she just stopped moving.
I just had to dig under a pile of condoms in my desk drawer to get to a blue book. Summer is officially over.
Awee what are you going to name your new dog?
What dog?
So question... If I'm sexting with uncircumcised guy, do I have to add *then i gently pull your foreskin down*?
Can you rollerblade?
No, why?
Honestly, I was high and picturing us roller blading together. I wanted to see if I could make my dreams a reality.
I would definitely ride that dick into the sunset if nuggets are involved
What are we just gonna be those girls that get fucked in your parents basement and not get taken to dinner? I don't wanna be those girls.
fucked him on the porch to avoid the chanting that always happens when we leave the bedroom. backfired when a group of freshman walked by and started screaming like fucking babies.
It's 6am and I had to explain to the gas station attendant why I didn't have shoes on and I'm covered in maple syrup.
Talked a police officer into driving us the 1/2 mile home from the bars because we didn't want to walk. I never knew the back of cop Cars had plastic seats.
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