you know you were way too high when you wake up next to a handwritten list of all the things you'd do for a Klondike bar
I don't remember much but I remember it was a unanimous decision that Santa was indeed real and Cait's stripping somehow proved this.
I dont even care how hung over I am, and how shitty this bus ride will be. That was the best sex of my life and it's a beautiful morning.
No. I just want to cuddle and talk about our feeling. Of course this a booty call.
Is girls night deemed a success when you piss the bed?
ok I know you arent happy with the way we ended but paying someone to pass me an STD is TOTALLY FUCKED!!!
We smoked weed. AS A FAMILY. IT WAS BEAUTIFUL.
i want to platonically make out with them, platonically. in the back of this minivan
They took the TVs out of the gym and the mini-Mart only had 2% milk. 2015 wants me to be fat
You're breaking my sexual little heart
I would be down to associate sex w taco bell
He's watching Always Sunny and eating refried beans straight from the can.
you know you're doing something right when your drug dealer insists on hugging you before you leave.
Where do you think your fantastically immense lady-boner for men in uniform comes from?
I thought I was drunk because I kept grabbing his arm instead of his dick
But then I realized it wasn’t his arm and that I was very lucky
Randomize
