I just peed in my kitchenbs sinlk. New low- maybe. am i embarrassed? Not in the least
fine then we can just have courtesy sex i definetly won't like it
Wow, Pearl Harbor and The Notebook are on. Its like the Im going to kill myself marathon.
thanks for not screaming that I'm pregnant when that guy was giving me his number.
Hey welcome to Rick's drunk text tree. Rick is drunk right now please respond with "shut up" to remove your name from this list. Thanks for playing.
so now that i'm sober i just want to apologize for violating your back seat...... on a brighter note thank you for playing the little mermaid song "kiss the girl," really set the mood.
When I said to shut up, I meant it. I'm sorry you have a bald spot now, but it was necessary.
I feel like we shud celebrate your sisters homecoming by having sex in her room
All I know is I want him to tie me up at least twice a week and I have an overwhelming urge to cook for him. Could this be love? I'm so confused....
Do u like your dick pics shot in hotdog or hamburger orientation?
He says I vaguely mumbled happy New year, kissed him, threw up and then went back to sleep.
My roommates don't agree with the whole tv in the bathroom idea. Fucking barbarians.
I don't think I've ever been sadder than the way I feel when I finish my meal while I'm high
His family, without saying anything, started a game of quarters the moment the drinks arrived. I love them. If only I didn't hate him so much.
Turns out that fresh outta jail dick is quite something.
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