woke up to the trail of sugar cubes leading to my bed........was i that uncooperative last night
I just decorated my birth control case with Lisa Frank stickers. If that doesn't scream 'I'm not ready for babies' I don't know what does.
He's stoned as shit, eating breakfast cereal and taking a dump. All while listening to dubstep. We may never understand him.
We were sitting in my backseat and he just kept biting me and telling me we weren't at the zoo...
just letting you know that jen either: wasn't feeling well and ate grass to make herself throw up or threw up because she's stupid and ate grass
And then the lady sheeps would bring me the finest grass to eat cuz im the sheep king and id have sexy smooth sheep fur
I don't remember anything that happened last night past 10.. I made him buy me a Buckeye's Donut tshirt. I have no idea why he'd want to fuck me after that.
Instead of a hangover my body just feels like shame
That is a hangover
I would prefer a headache
You can see my drunken state get worse with each picture
Two drag queens are fighting over me. And yet the night is still getting weirder
So I just got drugs from a house with a giant cross on it. Thank you, Jesus.
30-degree weather + Metal Cockring Monday = really hard to pee.
We drank vodka and koolaid through a traffic cone. It got rowdy.
I fear our relationship is coming to an end. Last night I felt the need to bloody apologise for waking him up with a blow job.
Woke up with a lip tattoo that says "fake news" in case you're wondering about my wellbeing
Randomize
