I've been thinking about all the girls in my life in terms of applying to college.
Huh?
I guess what im trying to say is that your my safety school.
dude i just figured out that the tostitos sign is two people eating chips and salsa. being high totally pays off sometimes
yup. cregs moms pubic hair is still glued to the celing
The stripper from Delilahs paid the desk clerk to find out my room #. Either Im doin something very right or she's doing it worng.
All that matters is I got the megaphone home safely
I have a scary feeling my mom might switch her goals from finding me a husband in 2012 to sending me to rehab
all law school has taught me so far is how to fart quietly during lectures and how to out-argue the ice cream guy when he screws me out of extra toppings.
I went commando last night, then accidentally flashed a police van...They acknowledged it.
Just played slippy cup. Flip cup plus slip n slide. What did you do with your fourth of july?
Dude, nobody just eats a banana these days. This chick wanted it. She wanted to get down with Charlie Brown.
Ryan Reynolds is on sesame street right now. Dressed as a letter A but still sexy as fuck. PBS is so considerate of the stay at home mom.
How is it that I, the only one that didn't drink last night, was the only one puking out the car window?
Well the other day she asked me how often I jerk off. So I guess things are getting semi-serious
The dick lei will go down in squad history
It's my day off, I'm going to Target to check out Moms in yoga pants
Randomize
