google image searching george stephanopoulos at 1 AM on a saturday night...once again
I skipped work to stalk him.
then they caught me trying to hide the turtle in the fridge
Fine. Just this once and because its veterans day will I send you a picture of my tits. You're lucky I love this country.
i've learned that i'm good at stealing things. like live cats.
Grilled cheese and whiskey for lunch is why i should NEVER be a housewife.
If i want her back i know all i have to do is sleep with a specific handful of her closest friends. That method is tried and true.
But you can still look for dick after you find Jesus.
Im pretty sure that girl just said "Im taking you home even if your girlfriend has to come too." Why are we here again?
i think she just faxed a picture of her vag from the office copy machine... i mean what kind of sexting is that... wait is that even legal???
She just made out with a golden retriever. I'm disgusted and turned on all at once
So, settle a debate for my housemates. Have you measured your dick. And how long. Results Will not be disclosed
It was an interesting experience to have sex while there was a triathlon going on right outside my bedroom window because it sounded like everyone is cheering for you in bed.
How supportive!
Lady Gaga is doing the 1/2 time show. I hope it's gay and liberal as fuck.
Last time I had a one night stand he ended up stalking me for two months.
So you're not picking up this weekend?
This weekend, I am Angela, visiting from Calgary. We'll have to roleplay this.
Randomize
