Is Jonathan Taylor Thomas a gay? I need you to google search it for me. Its important
i know he has to tuck it when he gets excited in public and all, but now he is just starting to show off.
After 10 years all I have gotten is one bra pic, at this point I should be able to draw your cervix from memory
I just went in my fridge and said to my turkey "see you thursday". I seriously have issues
Clusterfucked is a frowned upon word in work related emails
Right, well, that begs the question of where did you get the whip, why are you using it, and why don't you carry one around more often?
I just found my "random bang list for summer of 2012" that I wrote last night.. It's written on a Plan B receipt. If this isn't irony I don't know what is.
I'm going to get pregnant and die... Mean Girls warned me about this but I didn't listen
Watching him is like watching a star slowly implode
Possibly having a threesome with my ex boyfriend and his current girlfriend was great closure on that subject
Really though. It's your life, live it how you want
And I do mostly. Which is why I'm now drunk in my room writing erotica
I peed outside 4 times after the bar, safe to say I had great night
So I lost my dignity between the strip club and your penis...
Last night we proved the theory that "harder" is the worst rough sex safe-word ever.
You know your life has gone off the rails when waking up in a Spanish hospital with alcohol poisoning and no memory of how you got there is not even your top wildest drinking story.
Randomize
