I thidmdmk you'gre a special person
CNN just did a special on how to do heroin safely.. I recorded it for us
I'm sorry but when I'm riding in the trunk on the way to mcdonalds at 6 am I just don't want to listen to reba macintire
Mass Text: Free blowjob to first person to bring me a nacho cheese chalupa.
19 Characteristics That Make People Instantly Attractive
You seemed more interested in the queso dip than you were in the hand job
Let's get one thing straight; we aren't in a relationship. We fuck and occasionally go to subway.
CHEMICAL ENGINEER. God my mom would be so proud of me.
I think I've just evolved into some kind of vodka fueled monster
btw im having a "its finally warm enough for a bbq in Toronto" party tonight. bring all the alcohol you have. and hamburger buns.
25 People Confess What They’re Shamefully Attracted To
My ultimate goal is to get laid wearing a horse mask... That would be awesome on all possible levels
Also CANADIAN LIPS TASTE OF MAPLE SYRUP AND APOLOGIES. SORRY.
Kellie accidentally ran into the car with two teenagers making out. made a big thud. there was a loud scream and she was gone...haven't seen her since
I think I should just be a madame. Fuck it.
I'm just gonna post fliers on telephone poles like, "who wantsta be a hooooooe?!"
And I must've sleep walked to the fridge cause when I woke up, there I was, balls deep in a fudge pop.
Other than trying to finger me on the couch in the middle of the bar a few times, you were fine.