i normally make it a rule to leave when white people start rapping... but they had blow.
We started playin just the tip, then shit got crazy
You thought last year was bad... a guy dressed as a clown showed up with cocaine
Puuuub goooolf. Being trashed at 830 never felt so right
Dude what hole are you on?....and its 9:15
hole5. 2 under par. irish nachos
Roommate is eating a chimichanga, watching Dr Doolittle 2 and weeping. His Tuesday hangovers make me feel better about my life.
But mostly the blowjob in the airport bathroom was what I was laughing at.
I was trying to get everyone to go to the bar but I puked on my hands, so nobody took me seriously.
I would do everything over again, except the fireball.
i would stab him if he didn't just tell me he is a priest
He played me Kanye.. Speaking my love language.. He got a well deserved BJ
Welp. June's off to a great start. I just ripped my pants, completely sober, at 10:30 p.m.
my mom talks about my drinking like its a problem and yet this morning she fills me a solo cup with champagne for the shower.
I think I was high. I asked a dude at chillis if they had a cereal buffet
Bleach your asshole, I'm on my way.
Who is this?!?!
We just started our own DARE program: Drugs are really enjoyable.
Randomize
