would you ever date a girl who drove an 89 Chrysler LeBaron? - for the record it's a convertable
I wasn't fucked. I was just drunk, because i was still able to walk into the woods and masterbate.
he keeps commenting everything on my facebook. it's like he's virtually peeing on me
look. either you want to have late night naked sleep overs or you don't. do not involve dinner and extraneous conversations in this relationship.
Your ass just called me, someone was yelling "awful waffle" and also, " I don't know who's hands are who's anymore"
he kept doing his monologue, "if a vagina could talk."
It reminded me of the time my mother gave my Bailey's in my stocking when I was 14.
I ended up passing out on the shitter for like an hour with mcds smoothie all over my face
Awkward moment: seeing and saying hey to the MILF you're sleeping with while shopping with your mother and sister.
Dude, you punched me in the face bc I wasnt ordering your tbell fast enough. Then when you got it, you threw it out the window bc, and I quote, "OBAMACAREEEE!"
So this tall girl jumped in our cab and I was like hey I have pics of u on my phone. It wasn't creepy at all
I should rephrase... I'm trying to not sit on other peoples faces besides my boyfriends.
so go get some goddamn bacon and lay in his bed naked. he'll love it.
MY MOM WALKED IN WHILE I WAS EATING THEM OUT AND STARTED ASKING US ABOUT THE PROJECT RUNWAY EPISODE WE WERE WATCHING EARLIER
she keeps trying to brush her hair with leaves and insisting she's not high
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