dude, you're being a jerk.
sorry, didn't mean to pull a Cheney
So would u like to explain why you ate all my pickels and took my 1800?
About that, i have your 1800 on my desk with intentions of returning it but theres nothing i can do about the pickels
Omg just want to confirm: got drunk, naked in street, fucked in bathroom and puked on bart.
You should ask if we are margaritasing tomorrow. and yes i did just turn that into a verb
He said that if more girls show up hes not going to ask ages... Spoken like a true sex offender
I'm now in all their contact lists as "Pee-Pee Hands"...
I just remembered I gave $20 to a bum last nite. Philanthropy events always make me do stupid shit.
And "sexual slave/chef" was as it turns out not a real career choice...
Walk of shame dressed as a Christmas tree, it happened. Ho ho ho bitches
Well, my breasts are swollen and I cried about the Iditarod. But I say PMS until proven pregnant.
We walked in and someone handed her an unopened bottle of jack with her name on it. She's like a drunken celebrity.
So everything was good he was big spoon I was little spoon and then I got peed on
People who don't like drugs and guac are not people I chose to associate with
This place is a maelstrom of dicks.
I mean as in stuck up bastards, not actual, desirable male genitalia. My point is, come pick me up fast, please!
on a scale from 1 to "can't put a toothbrush in your mouth without gagging" how hungover are you?
Randomize
