What drug did you take that made the cabinets scream at you?
he conducted the entire waffle house into singing the song Oklahoma. He was wasted.
After throwing up in a tequila bottle on my nightstand (still not sure how she did that) she asked if she could slip into something more comfortable.
Somewhere in the night I send my Dad a text stating "YOU failed as a parent"
I get off at the next exit which doesn't have a shoulder, a guy is riding my ass so I cant stop. I think I got as much puke on his car as on mine.
All hell broke loose. When the police showed up, this kid somehow haggled with a cop to let him pee in public. I'm convinced he could talk the panties off of a nun
At 12:16 am. We just got out of the truck and went behind it and fucked. With 3 people in the truck. On the side of the road. As cars drove by.
Dude I woke up and he was pissing in the corner on his clothes... I called his name an he replied " I got this" and continued.
The last thing I remember is him yelling from across the room "WE FINISHED THE HANDLE!"
It was 11pm.
He used one of his curtains as a leash and hand restraints. He wins the creative sex challenge hands down.
It was after I slept with him he tells me he's a juggalo
Well it was nice knowing him
Ahh yes. I lost my pants and swimming suit and phone charger. And I've found out who has them all even while hungover. Successful day. Nice party too.
Im playing a game I have to take a drink every time my gram asks me the same question hammered by 4 guaranteed...
I think I deserve an award for the breakup text I sent him. Like a pulitzer prize or a donut or something.
I’ve basically been controlling him with my tits for months now, so I can’t even imagine what would happen if I start banging him
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