just saw a prosititute with a baby stroller...question is...if the baby wakes up is the blow job free?
She made fun of how I walked so I announced to her boyfriend that I have cum on her face before.
lets make a pact to never make a pregnancy pact
She just dipped a dollar bill in her queso dip and almost ate it before I slapped it out of her hand, no more bar crawls..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i dont understand blimps. what would happen if they collided would they just bounce off or fall to the ground.
dude how high are you right now?
do you think jeeves would know? you do it. ask jeeves.
Pretty sure the cab driver can even smell the sex coming from between my legs
Passed out on the bench in the men's bathroom. Feel much better now.
Dude walks in wearing jean shorts and a graphic tshirt and goes home with an attractive female. EXPLAIN YOURSELF UNIVERSE.
When you are old and getting humped by saggy balls every other weekend you are gonna wish you had more sex with freshly legal boys. Your vagina will thank you one day. Don't let her down.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I turned around and there were three 10 year old kids running around with sparklers. Weirdest college part ever.
Welcome to Philly.
I hooked up with a blind guy last night... he's clapping in order to find his way around our apartment
Evidently I placed three booty calls at the same time...it was an ugly scene. I'm never getting that high again.
At least your vagina gets to vagina again. Dust that thing off.
New low: eating a buttered roll while taking a shit.
This is why we're soulmates.
I told my mom that I might be hungover today so she needs to make me an omelet.. it happened and I'm happy
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