yup put them legs up on your shoulders and eat her like some folgers
eat her like coffee?
remind me not to puke in the mesh trash can tonight
Was just practicing flip cup with my NyQuil cup...
the last 2 times weve had drunk sex ive had to get the morning after pill.. he's turning into a real expensive fuck buddy.
The drugs are starting to wear off. Suddenly aware there's a girl with bald patches and 2 guys that don't have a full set of teeth between them.
It was as if you forgot how to speak normally. All of your words came out either backwards or in song form
Yeah he's still asleep. I washed the blender out. He tried to make a ham-shake. Lets wait until after break to have that talk. I kind of want to see where this goes.
Im pretty sure at one point a very high you yelled, with actual tears in your eyes, "im not wrestling with you anymore, you dont respect my safe word!!"
Can I color on your dick again?
I'm going to fuck every single member of the men's olympic swimming team and no one is going to stop me
What exactly do I say to a random stoner hookup to thank him for ending my dry spell? Is it awkward to just say "Thanks for that. It was well needed."
Those thigh tattoos deserve the handsomest of grins between them. Dont settle.
STOP BUYING ALADDIN PANTS WITH MY AMAZON CREDIT CARD
Do you think I could use my teacher of month Award to get free drinks?
I'm not going to waste the next hour of my life writing a diplomatic email explaining that she's bitch. I have Parks and Rec to watch.
Randomize
