I only want to know people that are dynamic intelligent and totally insane
she was hot for a redneck and i dont look at teeth
ur dog is so gonna tell on us one day.
for doing what?
for smoking bowls out on the deck while your parents aren't home.
the only thing i have to deal with now is the fact that i'm still wearing spandex shorts from last night
they could make at least 3 episode of "i shouldn't be alive" out of my weekend
Just saw the hottest 4 garbage men ever. They should make a calendar
He had me believing he was actually British until he came and used his real voice.
He said that he didn't know what level the sun was on, and then he puked.
The guy at the door just stared only at my boobs and said "I'm gonna let you in." 'Merica
If someone told me one person in the department was secretly a death eater, I would suspect her, no contest.
The moment I said this burrito on my nuts feels really good is the moment I knew I was drunk
FINALLY GOT MY TENTH DICK. PARTY FOREVER
According to my Fitbit I was passed out in my car for 2 hours after she got us kicked out of the bar
We broke up. My life is now 7 inches less.
taking shots alone in my kitchen before I go learn to give a lapdance. when did this become my life?
Randomize
