yo I sort of want to fuck rachel maddow. but I'm not a lesbian. actually I reaally want to so maybe I am a lesbian. at least on weekdays at 9.
Nobody needs to come anywhere. Except on your face.
i don't think you understand, blowjobs are like flowers for guys.
Then I opened the closet and then i found the babies
She wouldn't stop saying her own name. Like a damn pokemon.
how do I tell him nicely and in french that we can't have sex anymore because his huge penis will ruin me for other french men?
Just got my cast off. My occupational therapist wants me to self-gratify. My clit is about to have an awesome weekend...
He rode a broom down the stairs while we were mattress surfing. Naked. Buck ass naked. WTF
This weekend I forgot a cup, so I drank my wine out of a Pringles can. So classy. You would have been so proud.
Two days later and my throat is still sore. That bong is a double edged sword.
I'd let you fuck my husband in the future, that's how much I love you
Also I'm so used to having sex with river guides that when he pulled out a condom I was actually surprised
Yeah but you let me touch your butt. You're clearly the winner.
I already plan to donate my brain to science so they can attempt to fully understand the complexities of my existence
Did you smoke and go to the aquarium again?
Randomize