Hey sorry i havent responded. i threw up on my phone while i was sleeping
How does everyone that never saw me naked know I'm built like a smurf?
who cares. he's ugly and has a dick this big -->
No I'm not okay I had a crush on the singer of Tokio Hotel for four months and now you tell me he's a dude?
Just so you know, coffee creamer+water does not = milk.
What happened to him?
He was walking right behind us then disappeared.. turns out he checked his luggage at a night club, continued to drink and dance, then slept on the 4th floor of some museum
Well if my looks don't work with her I'll eat the 50 nuggets to impress her fat roommate.
I just bared my soul to you and you fell asleep. Or you're fucking your boyfriend. Either way, not cool. fuck.
Letting two friends screw at my place in exchange for weed. This is my life.
Dude, I traded weed for crunch berries. Happy Thursday.
It's funny that when I fall down as an adult I'm so much happier no one saw than that I'm not seriously hurt.
You said "this is only my eighth drink" with like 6 separate drinks
Woke up to your boyfriend in my bed last night. What's that about?
I legit feel like I had sex with Joey Fatone. Is that weird?
It was just like the old times. We watched movies and shit. But not like old times-i fucked her hot brother when she was in the shower? Times are a'changin.
Randomize
