this guy showed up at my house asking for his sword and cape. something tells me i shouldn't drink that much again.
WHAT IS WRONG WITH SOCIETY?!?!?!
... says the kid who took a shit in my parents dishwasher...
Dude stop singing. Your life is not an episode of fucking glee
i'm sorry, i thought "hey, she wants TO FUCK YOU" was a good enough cue
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If court goes my way we are flying to Vegas.
Well going home with a Ralph Lauren model helped me get over him real fuckin' quick. Would recommend it for all women going through breakups
I was convinced to buy a man thong.
But it's Armani so it's okay.
God I just out gayed myself.
Apparently I showed all your grooms men my vagina to prove I did not have underwear on. Awesome
we just talked about our morning and what we were doing for the day and he handed me the addies and i took $50 out of my bra in front of a bunch of frat guys. so the mornings going really well
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well I mean enduring a 45 minute conversation about C-sections was worth the 9 jello shots those soccer moms gave me.
You should really look at your snapstory. It has us screaming " MANSION DICK! SUCK IT! FUCK IT!" By the way im currently in a mansion and need you to pick me up
I'm actually really happy I can say that my first body shot was out of a gay strippers massively ripped chest
Just rode a bull topless for a free bar tap for a month
i still cant feel my toes or walk straight...its been 2 days.
I shouldn't be allowed to be in america for NYE... or any major holiday for that matter
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