Everytime she opens her mouth it's like a fucking terrorist attack on my life.
benefit of terrorism--they won't let you buy random one way plane tickets to random parts of the country for no reason nonmatter how high you are.
i asked him how he could stand the smell of skunk. his answer was "it smells like good weed"...
flashcards smell like vodka and my textbook is in the toilet. ready for the final
What a good family we'd make, him and I and our kids and his good dick.
i keep seeing random pieces of my outfit all around town.
I began mixing captain Morgan and jack daniels and called it captain jack sparrow. I puked. a lot.
I would rather burn my vagina off with a damn flame thrower before I would touch anything that has touched her skank ass.
I'm confused as to why I have a picture of your boobs in response to a photo of my father
So lets not base feelings on vagina tingles
you fail at everything in life besides blacking out
never stay at a party until 5am. even if it's because of daylight savings. we ended up having to watch porn with the host's dad...
i'm drinking soco out of a mickey mouse cup right now. i love it when college and my childhood meet in the middle.
I've been on the cocaine and semen diet for the last 24 hours, lunch sounds great.
Standing straight up with intensity he came in his own mouth. I know this because he showed me the video from five different angles when asked if I would like him to demonstrate. And I did.
Randomize
