Why does lindsey know I was naked in the kitchen?
Becky drew a cock on my face and is making me sit on the step.
what did you do that she drew a cock on your face and supplemental questions why did you let her?
i bought a pregnancy test with dimes. Is that trashy?
you refused to leave the drive-thru at mcdonalds until the cashier took a jello shot
After we hooked up, he left the room and no one has seen him since last night. That kid redefined hit it and quit it.
I told them the reason I passed out was because of "heat exhaustion." Not from showing up drunk. Good thing this is Arizona.
pregamed for the floor meeting. so stoned. i keep thinking my RA is shrinking.
You need to simmer down or I'm going to buy you a labia leash.
we managed to melt a few different forms of plastic into the cannibutter....
They are gonna stay together and get married and have 2 children before he wakes up and realizes that there is more to life than anal
He makes balloon animals that get you high? Hell yeah invite him over!
So I wore my ankle step-counter exercise thingy while I rode him. Don't fuck him- I only burned .2 pounds.
The next morning I found her spread eagle asleep on the living room floor and he was asleep with his head in her crotch. I needed a ride and had to wake them up.
He got mad at you last time bc you tried to rap battle him via text. This is strictly business.
Had to trim my nails cus they got too long to effectively finger myself with
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