Food network will be on but we won't be watching
O by "watching" I mean "background noise"
If he comes back to you and I'm left alone in lonelytown I'm totally going to poo on your car.
When he took off his pants i accidently shouted "that is one small wiener," and thats when he left
you'd think someone with a dick that small would take what he could get
she was using a pencil to fish crushed adderall out of a plastic bag. it was like a college version of fun dip
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He passed out naked in my bathroom, then took a shower, then passed out again and then took another shower. Last time I let my brother visit.
be proud. or at least amused. an 18 yr old and a 25 yr old at least makes my average hookup age this week the same as my age.
You're such an expert partier. I feel like 22-year-old recent graduates should have to intern with you.
I'm a pro at the other 9-5
The milf did the body paint, come to the bar
My ultimate goal is to get laid wearing a horse mask... That would be awesome on all possible levels
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I know, but the fabulousness of my baggies should not be what defines my business as a drug dealer.
It's like the bat signal. He only texts me when I'm naked.
I just choked eating whip cream from the can, and peed a little because I was coughing so hard. How am I still single.
Wait... why were you finger painting at one in the morning?
It was the scariest thing ever having a flame that close to my balls...
I banged a marine last night. No wonder everybody respects them.
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