it feels like my vag is blowing bubbles
My jaw hurts. Such a slutty injury..
"Party in the USA" was played at church youth group last night. It was like everything I enjoy hating was aligning against me.
A guy on the street just growled at me and said damnnnn. Sometimes it scares me how attractive i am.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He gave me his business card. It was a Justin Bieber trading card with his number written in sharpie. I have to call him don't I?
You can't be mad because the taco bell people like me and not you. I'm not the one that puked in front of them.
We're pregaming our midterms. Also, when we get our tests back, we're taking a shot for every point we lost. If you're not in, you should just go ahead and transfer.
I don't give a damn about what he wants to do with his life. Personalities are for pussies.
Dude true life I died at the derby...I lost everyone I knew, went down a bourbon and mud slip and slide, lost my hat, fell off the roof of a porta potty, sprained my ankle and knee and then got arrested.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
On another note I never thought having a drug addicted stalker would prove useful
i'm sitting in bed scratching my boobs and wearing a sparkly fedora and have no one to blame but myself
we are not getting arrested this weekend. I don't care who I have to blow its just not happening.
My "birthday sex" consisted of approximately 25 seconds of him going down on me in the shower.
I dont know. He's too private. After you fuck him find out his secrets.
I may just have to resign myself to life in flats. He's a sexy little chipmunk that worships me.
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