At Coney Island the sign for the rollercoaster The Cyclone says, "Make sure your glasses and weave are secure."
Question: why is there a dildo glued to my kitchen table?
thanks for not screaming that I'm pregnant when that guy was giving me his number.
I think I'm cybering, it's been a while and its more in depth than it was in 8Th grade.
Dude she let me cum on her face
You have the wrong number I'm the she who let you cum on her face unless some other girl has let you since this morning
I am in the hospital with a broken wrist because a guy told me that if I punched him it "wouldn't hurt." it hurt. me. Thank you 11 jello shots.
I think your going to be the cause of an awesome death
great! i almost saw a gas station fight, and i believe i became the first person to successfully pee and puke in a bathtub simultaneously
She said we should all be mermaids since didn't breathe for 9 months inside our mothers. I want her logic.
literally hosing herself off in my back yard with the hose. i offered her the shower but she refused. that drunk.
If I got to choose how I die, it would be in an Olympic sized pool of gin and tonic.
The friend zone. He put me in the friend zone. But said he still wants me to suck his dick. I'm in the dick sucking friend zone and I want to die.
Eh. Fuck him. He's missing out. I'm legit naked and drinking straight from the bottle of wine.
Yeah bc that's when u should take a Molly. At a house party with everyone from ur hometown
Im going for myspace 2006 goth bitch. Your worst nightmare
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