this ugly chick literally cried last night because i wouldnt let her give me head
Do they take checks?
Did you really just ask me if you could write a check for a DRUG DEAL?
Of course, you get to fuck all night while I'm stuck in the girls bathroom sucking a limp dick for coke
How do i tell my boyfriend " I'm taking the two weeks im in Europe to fuck my way across 9 countries" in a way where we will still be together?
I am now trying to reassure her that she doesn't have a wide-set vagina. So thanks, for whatever you said.
There are so many Jimmy John's employees here
Where are you?
Jimmy John's.
Can we make a pact that if we're 40 and still sluts that aren't married we can get civil unioned the fuck up and raise an asian baby as our own?
A big toe in my vag is not foreplay.
Dear Jesus. Send me strength to not suck cock this morning.
Senior week was like trying to herd cats. Very drunk cats.
I've done dumber things than this for flimsier reasons. Come with. If I pull it off I need a witness, and if I fail I need an escape plan.
He asked me if I want to play Uber Driver, is this some new sex game or is he drunk and asking for a ride home?
When you wear a dress that resembles the shape and color of Kirby to a wedding, you get the attention you deserve.
just saw two eagle scouts making out in chic-fil-a
Guuuuurrrrrl! He ate the 🌮like it contained the Covid-19 vaccine!
Randomize
