i was like the pretty and slutty 8th grade girl who goes to a party, gets wasted, and ends up having sex with a senoir
details?
alcohol + bed + penis = sex
Pete just told the whole party I'm a squirter
its easy. just sleep with a bunch of guys until one falls in love
It's official. Every guy I've slept with has been to jail.
Just saw ur first draft of ur suicide note.
You spelled "worthless" wrong.
we just made rock paper scissors into a drinking game
i totally fed the cab driver fruit salad with my hands while he was driving
Something about getting head on stairs. I don't know.
Well, on the plus side, the hospital gave me a shirt that says "Makes a bad ass look good"
So I almost just died there. And we need a new garage door.
And now whenever I see a documentary about dolphins, I think about sex, which is super weird
I just tried to brush my hair with a can opener. Who gave you that brownie
YOU TOOK A FUCKING SNAP OF ME TRYING TO PEE! I'M GOING TO FUCK YOU WITH THE BUSINESS END OF A RUTED RAKE!
No problem...what are friends for if they can't rub eachothers genitals.
Unless it has to do with ramen, goldfish, cheese, or rugby, don't talk to me.
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