Tell him to shut up cuz i said so. I lost my dollar shoe :(
Dude that chick in the corner just threw up
Hot
i woke up on my kitchen floor, halfway through a text, and my mascara running... this is why i stopped drinking tequila
All the walks of shame were condensed into the hour before parents started showing up. Move out day is so bittersweet
I really need to find better places to throw up. I would like to be able to use the bathroom sink the next morning for brushing my teeth
You mean 'full wolf form' wasn't a drunk text?
They kept trying to slap each other but they were poring beer onto their hands first referring to it as their baby powder
Like it was the Mama Mia of shit shows. That bad.
He ate me out while I was wearing a tiara.... I think I could get used to this
finally remembered how I know that chick in my history class. she made and fed me ramen when I was wasted!
This hickey is now green and covers half my neck. I have an alien hickey. I think he thought my neck was dinner.
Just realized I used a picture of my little sister to holler at a guy, only 3 months old and she's already my wingman.
apparently my buddy was fucking on our couch downstairs so i decided it was necessary to walk downstairs naked in a hockey mask.
Can you face time me. I need to know if this pill is xanex or ecstasy
I love you so much and not just because your dick is perfect
Randomize
