hook me up with the drugs dog keep up the good work
Where you are. You must stay where you are are
Where you are. You must stay where you are arewhere are youu
Where you are. You must stay where you 5eare wher are you!!
You screamed 'pound me, you big thick stud.' I looked around for porn cameras.
Shut up. I did not.
I really wish I was making that up.
why does the wii remote smell like your vag?
its totally unfair that im just as ill-prepared as a 16 year old but there's no tv show for 25 and pregnant.
we tried to steer you away from them but you just kept yelling 'i need dick' and going back. sorry.
What did you wear last night? Because I'm pretty sure there are atleast 4 Facebook statuses about your walk of shame.
Im blasting "Fat Bottom Girls" as loud as humanely possible in attempts that old ladies doing water aerobics will take the hint and get the fuck out of the pool.
They told me you were taking cheese cube shots and chasing them with barbecue sauce... Is this true?
My brother just asked if I would keep having one nighters with that guy because he really likes the organic cotton v-necks he leaves behind.
Speaking of ejaculate, did you get the side of your car cleaned off?
when you greet her, try not to lead with "this night will end with you on top of me". first impressions, bro.
I was trying to be quiet until started to feel like my cock was being dipped in a rainbow and then I stopped caring temporarily
No, gay couples have the same problems straight ones do; I wish that we could go back to the days when he would shit with the door closed.
Totally reading about penis envy for my final exam
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