if all i could do was poop and smoke weed, i'd be eternally happy
amen to that sister
You all can go fuck yourselves. As far as I'm concerned, don't come back to karaoke.
what part of covering your puke with shaving cream seemed like a good idea?
Is it just me, or does Colt McCoy look like Herbie the Dentist from "Rudolph the Red-nosed Reindeer"?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
there is a baby dancing on the table amidst the smoke of multiple cigarettes. i want to trade lives with that baby.
I'm having a flashback of telling a guy that he was beautiful and graceful like a unicorn while playing shuffleboard.
Apparently, Mom was less-than-happy about us shotgunning beers before we opened presents.
happy find a boyfriend by next Valentines Day. Its like a new years resolution but depressing
I'm sitting here bra-less eating jalepeno candied bacon. You know you want this.
Coming.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If I show up to the mall alone looking like I do to purchase a vibrator and some Japanese food, I would judge me too.
Is it weird that I only look up my ex on Twitter when I take a shit? May have conditioned myself to associate him with shit
It's like those toothpaste commercials where 4 out of 5 dentists would recommend your vagina
I CAN SPEAK THE LANGUAGE OF THE ANIMES.
I wanna get to the point where I can just send a question mark and get an exclamation point in response
Dude, he came to our house with a beer can in his hand dressed up in a chicken suit screaming, "free eggs!" then threw up and passed out in the front yard.
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