what, no i told him that it wasnt nessesary to put all 5 fingers in my vagina
dude if Megan calls say you Sis was house sitting for me yesterday , she f'n found dana's panties
how much land on farmville do you have now? i sold all my shit to make room i need more money... these animals need to know I'm running a business not a charity.
Your fb status are always so intriguing.. Often make me picture you naked
You owe me a new pair of headphones. You plugged mine into the top of a mustard bottle.
We discussed our relationship status. We're dating exclusively. And the conversation was followed by him saying "C'mon baby, let's make you orgasm!" .....I'm gonna marry him.
Just took my pill on time for two days in a row. I deserve a prize.
Not having phil's child is good enough.
I'm dealing with this like an adult, cupcakes and beer.
I asked him how his night was and he sent me a picture of a bottle of Ciroc with a bendy straw...
The trick will be getting hammered before we get to the first bar
Challenge accepted
I'm high and I have a consensual booty call on the way and just thought that it was a good time to let you know that I think that you are a stellar person.
I am not a slut. I'm just very open with how much I love to have sex. Stop judging.
He told me he felt the only proper thing to do was fuck me to the top of the corporate ladder
WHY DON'T YOU WANT TO BE MY ESKIMO BRO
it wasnt weird until his dog watched upclose as i put a tampon in
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