I have two girls sleeping in my bed naked and I ended up making it to class, what were you saying about staying in on the weekdays?
what is TOTES MCGOATS in spanish?
connan obrien reminds me of an asparagus spear
He sent me a pic of his Junk. He said it was a Brett Farve valentine.
i wasn't going to tell her about the threesome but i had to explain the tree and the green paint everywhere
It's ok. Rob's just shotgunning upside down.
No dude I got way too drunk to function. 90% sure I tried to FaceTime 911.
RA just said I set the all time record for a student who lost houseing..30min..I was moveing out while my new roomate was moveing in. know of any off campous places to stay??
You asked me to pick a color between pink and purple, and I said orange; you told me, "okay, that's a truth question". Then you asked if I had ever deep-throated a cupcake...I didn't even know what to say.
Lesson: Never rollerskate with a 40 in your hand unless you have a destination.
So after taking my shirt off, he pulls my bra off like a hockey jersey. FUCKIN PRO. Guy knew what he wanted.
my nose is crying tears of wow.
Started mixing booze directly into the 2 liters and carrying them around. Mixing less often, and now kind of weightlifting,so double effecient.
Can you hurry up? Jamie just challenged my ex boyfriend to a duel and someone honest to God handed her a sword?
She didn't have her own?
Dreamt I had my own personal vibrator rep, who made house calls. I earned an upgrade to an electric model, since I was burning through batteries. That's it. Time for a bf.
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