I just found 'pokemon orgy' in my search history
It was awkward until we both realized our obsessions with harry potter and sangrias were the same. Now were in love.
You need tk get a life and stop texting me about fictional characters. I don't give a shit.
were with a gay guy with a minnesota accent. think about how funny that sounds.
you left him a drunk voicemail of you singing speechless by lady gaga balling your eyes out
I would explain the ketchup stains in the bed to him but saying I just got my period is so much less embarrassing...
The slutty girl scout law, revised for halloween 10: on my honor i will try, to serve my vagina and my shot glass. To hold back friends hair at all voming moments and to live by the sluttly girl scout law.
did you dip my ponytail in franzia? its the only thing i can think of to explain my hair right now.
I don't know where Tiffany is but I just saw her shoes in the bar lost and found
Joe decreed the livingroom and the hallway up to the burn mark his kingdom. I think this is the point of 'stage an intervention'
Your subconscious sucks. Mine is awesome. I have a recurring dream where I manage a chocolate factory run by big titted hookers.
A) you're a liar. B) that would be awesome.
Walk back down Church toward Mass Ave. Take a right and head for the guy in a kilt on top of the really tall unicycle. C u soon!
He used one of his curtains as a leash and hand restraints. He wins the creative sex challenge hands down.
Yes. I'm realizing that sports games are good reasons to drink. I just cheer when everyone else cheers.
You just kept yelling GET YOUR SKATES ON, BITCHES. WE'RE GOING STREAKING.
the orange of my hangover Tang is hurting my eyes... my coworkers knew it was hangover Tang too.
Randomize
