problem. drunk. stepbrother hitting on me again. help.
Phrase i just heard while watching the U.S. open: "Boy they have really trimmed it well, this has got to be the tightest hole in the Open."
I told my girl, that I use to jerk off to Star Trek. All she says is, "Oh my gawd, you're such a trekie!". If I was her, I'd be weirded out more than me being a Trek Fan.
Holy fuck. She looks like Vin Diesel's stuntman
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She told me she was selfish for not giving me a blowjob... I couldn't agree more.
Was this before, or after you took my brand new bag of shredded cheese, and "Made it rain"?
You only ask me to come over when your gf is gone, and thats usually at midnight to cook chicken salad and watch you pass out
I STRONGLY considered not bringing that guy home with me last night simply because I'd JUST changed my sheets that morning.
I knocked myself out momentarily last night when I fell and hit my head off of my jewelry box while trying to take his pants off... while he was passed out.
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We duck taped Dave to a rolling chair and shoved him in the bed of the truck then took off for a bit.. We didn't explain it that way when the nurse asked what happened though.
Okay so the couple who keep propositioning people for threeways are def siblings not bf/gf
So are you gonna do it or no you said they're hot
after the ketamine those signs on the bathroom door had little meaning to us
Why did my mother make you get naked?
i think i just naturally attract stoners
I can't take 'get a man' advice from you. You'll stick your penis in a warm banana peel.
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