Just looked in the bathroom mirror before getting to this exam to see If I look as bad as I feel & the answer is no. I look amazing, even in yesterday's clothes
Good luck man
I dont need it. Shes easy.
my hangover today makes thursday's feel like a bubble bath.
the women in the ladies room did not appreciate my innovation of turning a sink into a urinal
the sex wasnt even worth changing my sheets
she danced around my room naked waving around the gold trojan magnum condoms singing "i have the golden ticket."
little did she know i was taping her the whole time.
it makes it look bigger when i shave, i hope its not the same for a girl
I wouldn't necessarily say I'm in her pants...I'd say I'm more on the on ramp to the freeway to the long way to her pants. There really isn't a short cut.
He paid me to blow him while doing a handstand. Does that make me a whore or just a budding gymnast?
Did strip banana grams actually happen last night
He told me he wanted to sleep but I touched his penis and listened to his heart beat start racing. I knew sleeping was bullshit.
Use your nursing skills for good, not evil.
Nautical themed porn is also great bc someone usually wears a captains hat
Everyone thinks I'm sleeping but I'm actually just melting.
sober me is the one who makes bad decisions every boyfriend I've ever had I met sober
Is it wrong to want to have sex with one guy who's good in bed before going out on a date with a guy I actually like?
Randomize
