I think we should urban dictionary "drive of shame." It involves a sprint to your car in his underwear and shirt, surreptitiously trying to put on your bra on at stoplights without attracting attention from neighboring cars, and lurking in your car a block from home so you can know when your roommate leaves for work.
Have you ever secretly resented a girl for wanting to have sex when all you really wanted to do was rub one out and go to sleep?
part of me always dies a little when i go to the "2 women seeking 1 man" section in craigslist's casual encounters to find nothing there. it's tragic
finally achieved: got laid in the religion section of borders. thought you should know.
It was one time. Now I have to constantly remind her my name is Jessica not Jizzica.
I told you I was good to drive
dumbass I drove... you sat in the passengers seat and steered with a paper plate
Very nice. It looks like a Fisher-Price My First Dildo, but still very nice.
We're gonna go drive around campus and throw water balloons at all the drunk bitches wobbling around, wanna come?
We are gunna have the best winter break smoking weed and eating ham
Cuz I feel like I ate the whole candy isle at 7/11 last night and chased it with rum
You pretty much did tho
Whiskey chased with ice cubes? Here's a big FUCK THAT to that
My intervention, when it happens, should have vanilla cake....buttermilk icing.
Does it get any better than dating a guy with a vasectomy? The answer is NO. No it does not
I also woke up in a bed soaked of pee and drunkenly lectured him on the dangers of chewing tobacco... weird night
You ruined the universe
Randomize
