Sandwiches eeeeeeverywhere.
I never said you were fat, just too fat for ME
I cant watch the real world now after jersey shore. its like trying to go back to vagina once uve had anal
hows the party?
ists fjcssing insceredle
be there in 10
It's going to be great. We're a perfect team to break up marriages and happiness.
that's why you don't digest questionable powders from girls wearing tutus at a dirty club
Also, I threw up on the playground again. I've honestly had more fun there this past summer than I did in my entire childhood.
I thought that u needed a break due the fact that your nipples were bleeding
No one understands the complete and utter debilitating 3 day bday bender.
what i'd really like is a nice helping of naked boyfriend with a side of naked boyfriend.
Apparently nothing brings out sympathy in a barista like asking if they have a hangover special
Like I just asked Greg why I don't have a crown for my vagina. That drunk.
You walked up to a random girl on the street and asked her for a bite of her pizza...
Please tell your sister I apologize about saying her baby may have beef curtains. That was inappropriate.
Why is there a mildly painful bruise on my back?
You slipped off the sink last night.
Why was I on the sink......?
;)
Randomize
