if there is a rhyme for it it must be true
JACOB AND UGLY BROKE UP
Blow job in a bar bathroom for my Thing 1 while in a onezie dressed up as Thing 2. Best Halloween ever.
I bet the Cat in the Hat never caused mischief like that.
Just filled up my pledge keg goblet with coffee at bp. They can judge all they want. At least I'm not killing baby dolphins.
As long as you're naked and covered in glow paint, I'm there.
Dramatic love triangle! I guess mystery Asian and I will just have to fight it out for your love.
It was fine until he came back to my place, grabbed a beer, HIGH-FIVED me, and left.
How do I discreetly dispose of sex toy packaging that is recyclable? What to do...what to do?
Fried chicken is a must. Do strippers eat fried chicken or should I plan on something else?
He said "you speak American pretty good for a Canadian" and it took everything in me to still fuck him. Dry spell ended btw
I should become her mentor. Get her life back together for her
You mean sponsor?
Tonight I plan on passing out fully clothed on the table. I don't know where normal people plan on sleeping.
If I show up to the mall alone looking like I do to purchase a vibrator and some Japanese food, I would judge me too.
I went from looking for a bong to home decor in a 10 minute span. This is what being an adult is all about!
I just compared my relationship to that double ended dong scene from Requiem. This day just took a turn.
Randomize
