Haha dude youd die if you were here. Girl presenting is defending the new testament and did her report on JESUS. best believe i'm gonna ask some hungover, atheist ass questions
I can only be a whore so many days outta the week.
Samesies
We've finally become those guys who you'd see in middle school when you went to the park who are just stoned out of their minds sitting on the swings.
I cannot believe I said bareback movement...
His penis without viagra is what breaks my heart.
I basically have a picture with a half naked foreign exchange student. He kept screaming rolltide and i felt like a traitor
Dude you missed it. This guy in the liquor store knocked over a whole display of 5 hour energy with his face.
I just bought us acid. I'm like the drug tooth fairy. Get ready to wake up with a sweattart of acid under your pillow.
You fell asleep on the toilet and he was like uh should I take her off?
He was wearing running shoes tho. Thats like the cardinal rule. You don't fuck a guy who wears running shoes as regular shoes.
I made my uber driver take a pit stop between clubs so we could restock on Xanax. #priorities
I'm SO high. And there is so much pudding in this car
Whatever douche. I sucked the dick that made you. I. Win.
its liver damage thursday
I'm too hungover to Google him and try to save face.
Randomize
