And then he said "I can't get blown while Gordon Bombay and Mr. Holland stare at me from the TV"
you made wolf sounds and yelled "team me" the entire movie
He proposed that we "bone". I've completely given up on boys.
dont worry about it. i always have emergency bong water with me
I wanna take him on a special date, something that says I banged your brother but since he moved I want you
Lying on this bed is like lying on love and marshmallows and joy
My period started right as he was entering, which really helped me sell the "I've never done this before" bit.
Idk man, she was drunker than me and i was sitting there talking to a raccoon about it's broken leg.
new costume idea. paint swatches and a ball gag... I'll be 50 shades of grey.
I'm about to start putting my tampons in the microwave for a few seconds these plastics applicators and this weather don't mix
Next time I feel awkward in a situation I'm going to just yell "free bird!!!!" Like some redneck at lynyrd skynyrd show
My friend wants your phone number so you can teach her how to take a beer bong. She saw you doing them last night and got jealous.
Just tell her to open her throat. I don't want to talk to anyone who is jealous of someone who woke up this morning with a cat in their shirt as a result of that glorious beer bonging skill.
She was from Wisconsin, she had great boobs... I mean... It's a dairy state....
But what if there are 6 people and they end up just pairing the off into 3 couples. Is it still an orgy?
If I'm not there when the plane leaves, I didn't make it through security. See you at home! Vegas bitches!!!
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