If I die today, promise to let the world know I partied.... oh god did I party
I feel like death. And death is wearing a fleece blanket as a dress. And is seriously contemplating wearing this to go get something to eat.
i crushed up some extenze and put them in his protein powder - should make for an interesting gym experience
we were so desperate we resorted to lego blocks. nuff said.
Just tried to tap morse code on the wall seperating our beds to tell you I was awake and ready to smoke
That's ok. Our relationship has a solid foundation of booze and questionable behavior.
I don't remember much but I remember it was a unanimous decision that Santa was indeed real and Cait's stripping somehow proved this.
She grabbed both of our dicks in the pool then said repeatedly, "this is my dream, this is my dream,"
Well, on the plus side, the hospital gave me a shirt that says "Makes a bad ass look good"
Come to wine Wednesday bro. We have a fog machine
Denim handjobs are the worst handjobs. I hate all handjobs. Why do people even.
I'm currently on a bowling date with my girlfriend and her boyfriend. It's pretty fun.
I mean obviously I like your dick... Jury is still out on you but your dick is good
He finally left. I didn't introduce him to the roommate. The sex is bad. I don't want him to feel welcome
home. only unpacked the necessities...contact case and beer.
Randomize
