It's not littering; it's giving birds nest building suplies. Besides, birds love soy sauce and plastic forks.
I dont need to watch it. And stop comparing your life to Entourage.
Did you know you could bring s cooler of beer to the nail salon?
Tomorrow night wont work for me. I'm talking with Bryan about marriage and I dont want to have a shroom hangover.
I'm taking stock of m life as of right now and my Friday night plans are to drink a 30 rack by myself so I can have a tv stand when it is finished
Its been 4 years since I have masturbated this hard. God bless the Olympics!
Please say a prayer for the elevator people at work today. My farts are significantly more potent the day after hitting that korean place for lunch...
The sun and I are not on speaking terms this morning
Unfortunately, the Bilbo Baggins adventure side of me that likes to go on adventures appears to be losing to the side of me that likes to smoke weed in the bathtub and watch Workaholics.
My 7 yo sister is trying to talk my mom into buying her a strawberry margarita. Happy Cinco de Mayo.
I have a sixth sense for dads free balling in gym shorts
I was going down on her and she started whistling "Whistle while you work." I'm in love.
MILK DIDN'T HELP. IT'S NOT HELPING
Did I wash my face last night at your house? Where did my eyebrows go??
if they didn't want us to do blow at uni, why would they make textbooks so smooth?
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