some dude just recognized me causeg he had a pic of us making out onvhis phone
I swear to god Kristen, if this "cute" guy you are trying to hook up with's friend asks me if we can role play, and I play his mother one more time, Im leaving. You have 3 minutes to save me or I am out.
The pink midgets playing hockey is the EXACT reason cold meds and alcohol do not mix. Period.
I remember going home with 2 girls. Woke up with 4.
Marriage: a sacred union between one man and one woman, and another woman in Argentina.
A disheveled girl in front of me just looked down, shrieked, and yelled to the girl next to her "what is this" while pointing at two large white stains near the crotch of her black jeans. I love that Thursdays are weekends, it makes awesome Friday mornings
Pretty sure that drunken football on the back porch with 6 guys with a champagne bottle was a bad idea....
what if his mom answers? its like high school, but hes 30
If everything I've heard is true, then she's lost her virginity three times
I just feel like a girl who's never eaten a pb&j probably doesn't swallow
Hypothetically speaking, what is the proper response if one gets bitten by a most likely not rabid squirrel? Hypothetically.
Wow. I feel like a bad friend. My fuckbuddy wished you a happy birthday before I did. The reality of that just hit me.
A beer is a heart your wish makes!!!
I also made him write a nonfiction romance novel about what happened and to give it to me when the time was right
Come get your boyfriend. He is hammered talking to me about hot dogs and casinos.
Randomize
