found a dugout with weed in it in dad's car. decided to top up the weed compartment with salvia. for fun.
dude, best porn name ever, "the Hunt for Red Cocktober"
Fyi mom and I voted and you're the DD tonight, congratulations
the last time i saw him was an hour he was floating face down in a pool... but i'm sure he's fine.
there's a sledge hammer in the bottom of the swimming pool... so whatever happened last night was probably awesome
I know I am usually the slut but tonight it's her. She is being a slut, yes slut, T as in Tomorrow, U as in Uterus, L as in Llama and S as in Sangria. That spells slut, but backwards and that's what she is being.
You were chewing up hot dogs and spitting them out
I would have rather watched a full length video of myself masturbating than heard that.
the campus cop used the word depravity in our citation.
I took a few sips of my hugeee bottle of liquid Vicodin and smoked my one hitter and now I'm going thru my attic like Indiana Jones
Like, he's a nice guy. But he's better at fingering than he is at speaking.
This guy smells like mr Rogers puppets and I don't know how to deal with it
Thanks for that golden cinnamony goodness that flowed from your fake tits last night haha
No. Nooooo. No way. She looked like Amanda Bynes. The recent one not the one from All That.
They left a cherry picker with the keys in it on a college campus, what else were we supposed to do?
Randomize
