party is dying down. we just wrote whore in the yard with gas. Photos to come.
I was just like staring at the lawn boy while singing "You Belong With Me".
I am the king of creep.
Dude. The girls called me over to see what they had in their dorm. They snuck in a pigeon in a cardboard box. They named it Quincey. They swear they're sober.
RIGHT?!?! I'M ACTUALLY UPSET I DON'T GET TO MAKE THE 2.3 MILE TREK TO SUCK HIS COCK, yes I google earthed it.
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I think they can follow the trail of blood to my house if they have a problem with me taking a dip in their hot tub last night b4 stepping on a broken bottle
It's christmas eve and my mom blacked out before me. If she beat me at that, what have I been learning at college?
Her stripper name is Geico. I'm not drunk or creative enough to make this up.
I would convert to being a Republican and Mormon just to sleep with Romney's sons. The things I would to do them.
All i remember about last night is holding a bottle of bacardi and screaming challenge accepted!
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Oh god I just realized bird face had che Guevara tattooed on her upper arm. Deals off, readivised opinion
I was gonna start crying but as he was asking me for my info i saw him eyeing my rack. So I sorta started pushing them together. He asked me to get out of the car he made me turn around so he could check me out and then he said and I quote "okay ma'am. Everything is fine, I'm going to let you off with a warning. Next time if you're not wearing yoga pants you might not be as lucky" I am blessed.
he came during what was supposed to be the foreplay blowjob. there goes my evening.
Morning fuck and a coffee. ARE YOU READY TO CONQUER THE GALAXY WITH ME??
plus like he's kinda a piece of shit. a beautiful somewhat talented piece of shit that hella needs to get his life together
Hey, I'm sleeping in your car...lol just knock on the window in the morning
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