I prefer the term 'tenderly watching'
such a stalker...
she wanted to love me. she just didn't know it yet.
just opened a can of spagetti o's with a butter knife. the things u will do for food when ur stoned.
Gentleman, we have a new medal category - number of women per day in apartment WITHOUT FURNITURE
the higher we get, the more he looks like ray charles.
No, he's fine. He only wanted to know why there were traffic pylons in the living room and how the peanut butter got on the ceiling.
He said he wants to make an itinerary for the sex we'll have when I come home.
Last thing I remember was wondering why there was a mirror on the wall behind the urinal and then realizing I was pissing in the sink.
Whore. There is deli meat in my wallet.
Well the streets were closed, so it was okay for me to just lay down for a little bit.
no dude free pina colada`s taste like what I would expect my penis to taste like except gay-er.
Feel better punkin. Your balls will be gently resting on my forehead in no time
Full disclosure. I fucked the fatty from work and shit is weird now.
So, in keeping with the last two years, are we going to watch the new Hobbit movie on acid again? It's kinda starting to feel like a Christmas tradition.
I'm tripping pretty hard right now but every time a Volvo drives by I feel like everything is gonna be alright
It's ok, I did squats with my bottle of wine before I opened it. That counts as the gym since I won't be getting there haha
Randomize