Being 21 is my favorite hobby I'm really good at it
He is such a gentleman, he paid for my plan b
i gave him head before the novacaine wore off...i think his penis touched my lung
I don't know how God could bestow someone that emotionally confused with such an awesome penis.
we should hire that guy that makes pancakes that we met last weekend for our next party. He can feed us, and regulate!
I thought your voice was coming from the walls. I've never been so relieved to find you naked in a closet
She called all of my friends to find out where I was last night. 7 out of ten said their place.
We fist bumped behind their backs while drunk hooking up with them... Do other girls do this too? Or is it just us?
Taking advantage of alcohol's depressant capabilities to curtail my fever. SCIENCE!
Cocaine can totally be concealed as MAC finishing powder. Drug dealer creds just went up 120 percent
I totally forgot about finals week. im the worst adderall salesman ever.
Have you ever just woke up in the morning and felt pregnant
this makes me concerned. not enough to actually do anything about it, but yeah.
Funny story... I got into my car and my porn started playing over my Bluetooth.
You're a brave, albeit stupid soul for wanting in on the fuckery that comes attached to my vagina
Randomize
