I just saw fred flintstone in my fruity pebbles!
what drugs are you on?
none, cept for the pain medication i got prescribed by the doc: it said 2 pills every 3 hours, but I took 6 cuz i'll be away from home later
i gave her road head last night, needless to say it wasn't the same and i bit a chunk of the inside of my cheek off.
the vast amounts of cleavage i'm sporting to my final says "no, I didn't study but don't worry I've got something lined up for when I don't graduate".
So, do you think I should wash the ashes off of my forehead before going to the strip club?
I'd say I should re evaluate my life choices, but I'd make the same decisions only faster and wearing a push up bra.
I'm looking for mother nature. And when I find her, I'm looking her right in the eyes and telling her to fuck off.
we def had a heart to heart that turned into a BJ last night
Also, lets remember that we have known each other for nearly a decade and our two most recent photos to one another are boxes of plan b
Stormed out of the house in frustration and now I'm in public and have to take a rage dump. Today sucks.
Fuck you. I've got onesies to keep me warm at night. And this bottle.
Well, I got drunk and told my family about what I expected sexually after a good first date.
It's only 10am and I doubt my day could get much worse. During my 9am meeting I had to sit between my boss who I fucked for my promotion and the guy he walked in on me fucking on the copier
He finished and he wasn't even totally hard. He actually came without a boner.
HOW IS THAT EVEN POSSIBLE.
We fucked on the roof... like that has to mean something
His wife isn’t coming to the wedding! I’ve got 48 hours to home wreck him. Gotta go, I have to shave my vajayjay and buy some really slutty underwear. Love you!
Randomize
