He seemed more like the type to get donkey punched by a she-male hooker to me
You know if a vagina was a face, it'd be ugly as hell...
and this is why i am such an inspirational person, i am the Joel Osteen of alcoholics.
The only problem is i have violated all potential new years resolutions at the new years party.
I mean, I'd wanted to go skinny dipping, hook up with him and have sex on a beach, so last night I basically killed 3 birds with one super slutty stone.
Walk of Shame today included voting.
it was like i was on a global safari of uncircumcised men
please visit steve this weekend, he is getting mature and responsible and shit which scares me.
I'm sure it's not the worst thing to ever come out of my ass
You know you are 86'd from the legacy right? You can't down shots then spike the shot glass
I will be there. invited or not. I go where the pancakes go.
I dont know if hes kidding... but hes drunk and said hes going to shave his balls. Alert your emt friends
I want to create a human. Discussion later.
HE'S FUCKING 19 YEARS OLD, HE CAN'T EVEN GET INTO A BAR WITH ME, WHAT MAKES YOU THINK I'LL LET HIM IN MY PANTS?!
There are footprints all over my windshield
You said you were making waffles...
Randomize
